The Most Noble Trait

"But Yaakov was a wholesome man, dwelling in tents" [Toldos 25:27]

Rashi comments: One who is not sharp to deceive is called "wholesome".

Someone who is not sharp to deceive said the Lubliner Rav, is the type of person who has no notion of how to go about deceiving another person. Such a person is called a "tam" - a simple one. However, somebody who knows how to deceive others yet chooses not to act in such a manner is referred to as an "ish tam" - a wholesome man.

Yaakov Avinu was familiar with the ploys of deception, as he testified about himself during his stay in the house of Lavan: "I am his brother in trickery". Nevertheless, he chose to walk along the path of truth and honesty, thereby earning himself the title "wholesome man".

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From this verse we see, said the Sh'lah HaKadosh (R' Yeshayah HaLevi Horowitz) that the trait of wholesomeness is the most noble of all the traits.

For there is no doubt, reasoned the Sh'lah, that Yaakov possessed every good character trait possible. Yet the only trait that Yaakov is explicitly praised for in the Torah is his wholesome character. This implies that there is no trait more exalted than wholesomeness.

Source: Rabbi Yisrael Bronstein

A Zone of Privacy in the Sheitel

Chani Wuensch makes wigs for married Orthodox Jewish women to wear in public. (Katie Falkenberg, For The Times / August 31, 2010)

By Elisabeth Greenbaum Kasson/ Los Angeles Times

Shternie Lipskier's is a stylish, deep red bob with short bangs. Elana Kornfeld's is a long, dark, glossy brunette that she parts on the side. Chani Wuensch's is a lighter brunette, with auburn lowlights and graduated bangs that fall softly across her brow. Chicly dressed and ranging in age from 29 to 36, the three are discussing their hair, or more specifically their sheitels.

Sheitels are the wigs that married Orthodox Jewish women of the most devout, or Hasidic, communities wear in public. It would be a surprise to the other patrons of the Studio City coffee shop where we've met that the women's hair is not their own and that not so much as a strand of their real hair is visible.

Wuensch is a sheitel macher, or wig expert. Kornfeld, who is Wuensch's sister, and Lipskier are both married to Chabad Lubovitch rabbis.

Covering their hair is part of tzniut, a spiritual path of modesty and humility. The word also is a general term for the group of Jewish laws that pertain to personal conduct, which includes dress. The application of tzniut to women's hair is so important that some Hasidic communities offer low-cost loans for sheitel purchases and collect used sheitels to donate as charity.

When asked about the belief among some Hasidic Jews that a sheitel should be ugly, Lipskier is quick to explain.

"Judaism doesn't equate modesty with unattractiveness," she says. "A sheitel allows a woman the ability to look good without compromising her privacy. Even if someone else doesn't know it's a wig, wearing a sheitel has a profound psychological affect on the woman wearing it. She is saying, 'I am not available to you. You can see me but you may not see my most obvious feature, which is my hair.' By wearing the sheitel, a woman invests her true appearance and real self in the most important place in her life, her marriage."

Another mistaken belief is that Hasidic women shave off their hair when they marry. An infinitesimal number of women shave, and they usually belong to insular communities.

Kornfeld smiles and pulls up a length of her sheitel hair to reveal a bump under the edge of the wig's cap. "I keep my hair long," she says, dropping the strands and rendering the bump invisible.

"I keep my hair short," Wuensch says, "because I don't like the weight of it under the sheitel, but it's really a matter of individual comfort and preference."

As a sheitel macher, Wuensch is skilled in the craft of fitting, customizing, cutting, styling, cleaning and reviving sheitels. She spent six months training with a wig company that caters to the Orthodox Jewish market.

Kornfeld and Lipskier are good ambassadors for her wares, which she sells from fitting rooms in Los Angeles and Burbank. Her wigs are made of real, untreated hair from companies that are considered the gold standard for wearers. They range in price from $1,300 to nearly $3,000. For a new sheitel, clients seek out Wuensch just prior to marriage and often before major Jewish holidays.

Cost is determined by length and whether the hair is machine-sewn in wefts directly onto a cap, or hand-sewn, hair by hair, onto a double cap. With careful upkeep, a sheitel will last two to three years.

Later, Wuensch suggests fitting me. She assesses my features and takes out an auburn, shoulder-length wig. She pulls my own long hair back and makes a flat knot at the base of my skull, then, gently shifting the piece from front to back; she aligns combs, clips, hooks and tabs. With a final pat and a light tug, it sits comfortably on my head.

The sheitel is beautiful, thicker and shinier than my own hair. The fit is seamless. I move my head back and forth and run my hands though the sides. The cap stays put and the hair moves naturally around my face. If I left wearing it, no one would know and what's underneath would be wholly private. For anyone who wears a sheitel, that's knowledge worth having.

Source: L.A.Times

The Rope of Moshiach

Rav Refael Dovid Auerbach (the brother of Rav Shlomo Zalman) related that over 90 years ago his father, Rav Chaim Leib Auerbach, once approached one of the caretakers who used to light the stove in a shul in the Old City of Yerushalayim. Although the caretaker was over 95 years old, he awoke early each day to light the stove and heat the shul before davening. The caretaker mentioned that his father used to travel to see Rebbe Elimelech of Lizhensk. Rav Chaim Leib asked the caretaker if he could relate anything his father had told him about the Tzaddik. The elderly man told him ten stories about the author of Noam Elimelech. Later Rav Chaim Leib told all of them over, but Rav Rafael could remember only three of them.

It was Rebbe Elimelech's custom, the caretaker related, to teach two types of Torah at shalosh seudos, the third Shabbos meal: one on the weekly parshah and the other about the days of Moshiach. Rav Rafael recalled the concepts that Rebbe Elimelech taught about the days of Moshiach, as told to his father by the old caretaker of the shul in the Old City.

In the times of Moshiach, the chareidim will be trampled and so badly mistreated that had this been so in the times of the Baal Shem Tov, no-one could have withstood it due to their fragile souls. However, in the times of Moshiach the hearts of the people will be so tough that they will be able to endure the trampling and degradation that will be common in those days.

In the times of Moshiach, there will be great foolishness, and the line between good and evil will blur. Rebbe Elimelech brought the analogy of sifting flour with a sieve. At first all the grains of the flour - the fine and the coarse - are shaken together, battered against the sides of the sieve. In the midst of the shaking, the fine flour passes through the sieve's holes and falls to the bottom, again receiving a blow when it lands.

When the course leftovers see the fine clean flour, they become arrogant and say "See how lowly you are? You have fallen to the bottom and received an additional beating while I, the coarse waste, have been left above and not received any beating."

The coarse grains do not realize how short-lived is their triumph, because in just a short while the sieve will be overturned and the coarse grains will end up in the trash for good.

In the generation of Moshiach, Hashem will, so to speak, stretch a long rope from one end of the world to the other, and all of Klal Yisrael will take hold and grasp the rope. Hashem will take one end of the rope, and violently shake it until they will all be in the air. Not everyone will be able to withstand this shaking and many will fall to the ground. The foolish ones will say "If Hashem is shaking us so hard, surely He wants us to loosen our grasp" and they will fall to the ground. Only the wise ones will hold on tight with all their strength and might. This is "chevlo shel Moshiach" - literally "the rope of Moshiach" - usually translated as "the labor pains of Moshiach".

Source: "Mipeninei Noam Elimelech" translated by Tal Moshe Zwecker

Torah Codes: 5771: Atomic Threat, Bin Laden, Yemen and Geula

Yesterday a plane carrying an explosive device from Yemen, headed for the United States, was intercepted in Britain. [Full story here]

Interestingly, Rabbi Matityahu Glazerson uploaded some new videos just 4 days prior to this: some new Torah Code discoveries which show that the words Yemen, Bin Laden, and atomic are encoded together.  In Video #4 of this series, Rabbi Glazerson shows that this year, 5771, is potentially the year of Geula (Redemption).

The four videos appear below:







A longer video on this subject by Rabbi Glazerson can be seen at Torah Anytime

On Ahavas Yisrael

Art: Lisa Viger

from the writings of Rabbi Sholom DovBer Schneersohn of Lubavitch [the Rebbe Rashab]

On account of our many transgressions, the sin of baseless hatred is found especially among pious people. Each builds himself a pedestal based on his own exclusive conception of Torah scholarship and avodah. There is neither bond nor unity between them. In truth, it is of fundamental importance for those who are occupied in Torah and in the service of G-d to join together and communicate with each other; for regarding the study of Torah our Sages applied the verse "Just as iron sharpens iron, so does one man sharpen another." Just as one iron sharpens the other, two sages sharpen each other in Halachah.

No person can assume (on his own) that his own perspective is valid. Only when one hears a colleague's opinion and each dialectically debates with another seriously, is it possible to arrive at a true view of the matter at hand.

Similarly in avodah (the service of worship and personal development), when people reveal and speak about their inner faults to each other, a number of benefits can be attained. For one thing, each person has certain faults of which he is not aware, for his own self-love [as the verse declares [Mishlei 10:12] "Love covers all faults"]. This surely applies to one's shortcomings with regard to various character traits. One's innate self-love masks them, and another person will help him by bringing them to his attention.

Furthermore, when a person reveals his inner faults he feels greater remorse than he felt before speaking. This stronger sense of regret over all past faults (leads him to totally) uproot his desire for them, thereby correcting his soul considerably. The confession of sins must be verbal. This corrects the soul of the sinner to a great degree, for the verbalization of one's sin strikes the innermost chords of his soul, causing him to feel great pain and regret.

Our Sages explained [Yoma 75a] a similar concept in their commentary on the verse [Mishlei 12:25] "Worry in the heart bows it down". The Hebrew verb ישׁחנה suggests a similar verb ישׁיחנה , meaning "speak of it". Thus the verse can be interpreted to mean "If there is worry in the heart of man, let him tell others (about it)". At the time one talks about his troubles, his pain becomes greater, but afterwards he feels better. Similarly in avodah, when one talks about one's inner faults, he feels greater pain at the time, but afterwards he feels better, for many flaws and sins have thereby been removed.

Furthermore, when people discuss spiritual improvement, each one proposes means of correcting flaws, and they can jointly resolve to correct certain aspects of their behaviour. A resolution reached by two or more people is more lasting than a resolution made by one person alone. Thus, it is obvious that many benefits result when those who serve G-d combine their efforts.

Now, this is only possible if one possesses the quality of bittul (selflessness) and is capable of coming close and becoming one with another person. But if one is dominated by yeshus (self-concern), it is impossible for him to reveal his inner faults to someone else. If he has a low opinion of others, how can he reveal his affairs to him, and what purpose will it serve? How could another person benefit him?

The fundamental reason however, for this attitude, is that he cannot become one with someone else, for in Torah study he stubbornly defends his opinion and thinks that his wisdom and knowledge is truth. He refuses to accept another opinion, or even consider it impartially without prejudice. When people discuss an idea in this manner, they draw further apart and become opponents. This disagreement in turn becomes a reason for preventing future co-operation and joining together, (for "he said such-and-such", and so on.)

Similarly, in avodah, such an attitude prevents cooperation and unity. One will not value the Divine service of another person or consider him to be an oved (one who devotes himself earnestly to Divine service through worship and self-refinement). He will minimize the worth of the other person's service and scorn and negate his positive qualities.

When he sees that another person possesses a fault - albeit a superficial one which does not at all affect the main body of his service - he will magnify it, speaking about it often, and humiliating him. Should he discover a character flaw in his fellow, (which is inevitable) for "who is so righteous as to have no flaws?" - he will say that this flaw proves that any good his fellow possesses is really of no consequence. He will exaggerate the evil to the point where any good the person possesses will be unnoticeable.

This is simply not true, for that individual's Divine service in prayer, Torah study and the fulfillment of mitzvot is in itself good, and constitutes his primary labour throughout the day. The negative character trait he possesses is merely one not yet corrected. "Man is born like a wild young donkey." [Iyov 11:12] He is born in an unrefined state and he must strive to correct his character traits throughout his entire life.

This service is alluded to in the verse "The days of our years - there are seventy years in them". The Hebrew word for "in them" בהם is spelled almost the same as the word for "animal" בהמה. A person is given seventy years in which to refine the seven evil character traits of his animal soul. This process of self-correction cannot be completed at once, rather [Shmos 23:30] "little by little will I drive (the heathern Canaanites) out from before you", i.e. considerable effort is called for. Only after extensive endeavours in prayer, meditation on G-dliness, and strengthening of the attributes of one's G-dly soul, is it possible to weaken, refine and purify, the natural emotions of the animal soul. And since the abovementioned individual serves G-d, he will surely refine and correct his character traits.

At times one needs help from others in order to achieve this goal, for one's own self-love will sometimes blind him from recognizing a negative character trait. A friend can make him aware of this fault and advise him on how to correct it. If one really loves another person, he will do so privately. If instead he dismisses him, scorns him, and humiliates him - particularly if he does so in public - this is a clear sign that he hates him and does not seek his good. (Nor does he genuinely want what every individual should desire - the service of G-d within the world, for this is G-d's will and desire).

The reason for this behaviour is his own lack of service; his own service is not sincere. Although he serves G-d in prayer and in study, he is not sincere, since he lacks bittul and selflessness, possessed as he is by yeshus and self-concern.

Source: "On Ahavas Yisrael - Heichaltzu" - A Chassidic Discourse by Rabbi Sholom DovBer Schneersohn of Lubavitch - Kehot Publications

Keeping Good Company

[Written by Rabbi Yisroel Bronstein]

"The children struggled inside her" [Toldos 25:22]

Why is it, asked the Chasam Sofer R' Moshe Sofer, that when Rivkah passed the beis midrash, Yaakov attempted to escape from her womb? After all, Chazal teach us that during the time a child is in its mother's womb, an angel comes and teaches it the entire Torah. Did Yaakov think that he would actually be able to lean more in the beis midrash than he would from the angel?

The answer, said the Chasam Sofer, is that though Yaakov was learning the entire Torah from the mouth of an angel, he was forced to do so in the presence of Esav. Yaakov preferred to learn Torah in a beis midrash, free from the company of his wicked brother, than to be taught the entire Torah directly from the mouth of a holy angel !

From the words of the Chasam Sofer we are able to learn, remarked the Chofetz Chaim, just how important it is to stay far away from people who may have a negative influence on us.

Spiritual Healing

Dr. Arnie Gotfryd interviews kabbalist/healer Rabbi Ofer Elfassy :

AG: I know about physical energies - heat, light, chemical, electric, kinetic, atomic - but you work with spiritual energy. What is that exactly?

OE: To understand spiritual energy, we should first understand the concept of give and take. There are those that are givers and others that are takers. For example, someone may be wise and scholarly, even a genius in Torah, but not have the merit to give, to share. The Creator is a giver, His kindness and care are infinite.

My definition of spirituality is giving. If we are to access true spirituality, we must becoming giving people ourselves. Once we tap into G-d's grace, we can then access His healing energy and transfer it to others. That's how I work with spiritual energy.

AG: What does it take to access this energy?

OE: The most important thing is bitul. One must put aside the ego entirely. A selfish person can never be a spiritual healer. The extent to which one negates his sense of self is the extent to which s/he can be successful in this mode of healing. The person with the greatest bitul is the greatest healer.

Read complete article at: Chabad World

Hat Tip: Dovid Chaim

Patience

You write that you suffer from talking before thinking, which means you are not being thoughtful.

The teaching of the Alter Rebbe is well-known regarding the verse "you shall quickly eradicate the unwanted elements from the good land of Israel which G-d gives you". The Alter Rebbe explained the verse in another way: One is to abolish "mehera" - hastiness and impatience - the opposite of thoughtfulness. When this is accomplished, the "good land", spiritually speaking, is revealed.

Practically, this means you are to study calmly and patiently, enjoying the essence within your studies. You need to eliminate impatience from your approach to learning and life. When you dwell on the Alter Rebbe's words, it will correct your problem, enabling you to learn with thoughtfulness.

The Rebbe then referred to a talk from his father-in-law [Sefer HaSichos 1940 p.59] which documents the original story with the Alter Rebbe. The Previous Rebbe recounted the story as follows:

Rabbi Yosef Binyomin relates how his grandfather, Reb Elye Reuven, once sat and studied in the beis medrash of Reb Moshe. He learned with extraordinary diligence, out loud and very quickly.

"I understood well what I learned, but learned very fast. The Alter Rebbe was sitting in the library of the study hall. As he passed by, he told me I was learning with much passion, but too quickly. I told the Alter Rebbe I was by nature an impatient person. The Alter Rebbe replied "One needs to change one's character".

I retorted "I cannot change my nature".

The Alter Rebbe responded "A Jew has soul powers and can change his nature by accepting the yoke of G-d. If one practices making the change, ultimately it becomes second nature, and the newly acquired nature transforms the original nature. Kabbalas ol (accepting the yoke of G-d) is a fundamental teaching in Torah and serving G-d."

Reb Elye Reuven said "The Alter Rebbe told me that the passion with which I learned was a gift from G-d. The Torah says "v'avadetem mehera meial haoretz hatova asher Hashem nosen lachem". The word "haoretz" also means "willpower", derived from the root word "ratzon" and this means that that willpower to learn Torah with passion comes from G-d. However, the Torah cautions one to use that passion for learning Torah by enjoying the spiritual delight of Torah. This can only be felt if one eradicates the hastiness from his learning. This is the meaning of the words "v'avadetem mehera": Get rid of "mehera" (hastiness and impatience)".

"The Alter Rebbe, with his few words, eliminated my impatience and changed my nature. My hastiness was removed and substituted with patience, which made me fortunate for the rest of my life."

Source: Igros Kodesh of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, vol. 9, letter 2923

"The Rebbe's Advice" adapted by Rabbi Chaim Dalfin