Disgraced Prince Andrew's daughter, Princess Beatrice,
has spoken about her 'imposter syndrome' which apparently is a psychological disorder defined
as a collection of feelings of inadequacy that persist despite evident success. ''Imposters'' suffer from chronic self-doubt and a sense of intellectual fraudulence that override any feelings of success or external proof of their competence. I must admit I had never heard of this particular syndrome before now, but it rang a few bells for me.
I often think I'm an imposter, and I shouldn't be on the internet at all. To remedy this, I immediately put up another blog post. Of course, I believe it is the yetzer hara trying to prevent me blogging about Moshiach. Now I have another name for it.... 'imposter syndrome'..... I guess there's a term for everything these days.
You need a thick skin to be a blogger with a wide audience, and I don't have a thick skin, I am extremely sensitive. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to delete my blog, or just turn it off and keep it for myself only, use it as a filing system [which is actually how it began - it was my virtual filing cabinet where I would post any article that I wanted to refer to later, which had a relevance to my life].
There are some very disturbed people out there, some just leave nasty comments and others have their own blogs where they attack from the safe comfort of their own site. I generally don't read these blogs, but occasionally when I have some waiting time and I check them out, I never fail to be amazed that they are still ranting about the same stuff over and over again, attacking others and getting facts wrong.... deliberately mis-reading and or mis-quoting and sticking a knife into their rival bloggers' latest post.
I used to publish every comment I received, with the exception of the obvious scammers or Xtian links, but over the past six months I've been deleting quite a few because they are cruel. I guess some of these people have issues with themselves and are venting at the nearest outlet that touches a nerve.... hopefully they will get the point and move on, as their bitterness is not welcome here.
Disagree with me all you like, that's fine, but please do it kindly and I'll publish you. I'm not really sure what I write that needs disagreements anyway, I steer clear of controversy for that reason.
Imposter syndrome.... a new term for the yetzer hara or, as I choose to think of it, a new term for hateful bloggers and commenters... they are im-posters.