Thursday, September 22, 2016

Watch Your Mouth

Ever since I heard Rabbi Kessin's Power of Speech I have been on guard for things I may say that could be considered Lashon Hara.  It is quite astounding [to use Rabbi Kessin's word] how many times we inadvertently say things that fall into this category, and generally we don't realize it.  But.... once you start focussing on it, it becomes quite painful to hear yourself speaking!

I can't over-estimate the insights gained from that shiur.  And please don't think it's just another boring lecture about watching your words, because it is actually a mind-blowing lesson in how the judgments of the world are handed down.  If you haven't listened to it, do yourself a favour, it will change your life, in so many ways, and you and your family will reap the rewards.

On this topic, here are a couple of instances of what NOT to say:

Know as well that in regard to the prohibition against rechilut [talebearing], it makes no difference if we tell Reuven what So-and-so said about him, or if we tell Reuven’s wife or relatives what So-and-so said about him. In either case, they will certainly be upset, and they will resent So-and-so as a result. Hence even if we have warned them not to tell anyone, it is still considered rechilut.

If Levi tells Reuven something negative about Shimon, and Reuven then goes and tells it to Shimon (thus breaking the prohibition against Rechilut [talebearing]), Shimon is forbidden to ask Levi: “Why did you say that about me?” In doing so, Shimon would be speaking Rechilut about Reuven. Even if he does not say that he heard it from Reuven, if it is easy to deduce that fact, then it is forbidden.

Source: Chofetz Chaim

5 comments:

Devorah said...

There is another version of this shiur on You Tube which you can reach if you click here and for anyone who was upset that Rabbi Kessin estimated we have to wait another 15 years for Moshiach, he does say at the end of this shiur that Moshiach should come in 5776 [20 mins before the end of the video, prior to the questions].

GoldieZP said...

Nah, I'm not upset if we have to wait another 15 years. After all, my 6 year old son, Yosef, tells me and has told others in Yiddish איך בין משיח ! If we have to wait - Yosef will be 21 years old. Hmmmmm. I have always day dreamed of sitting at the feet of moshaich and according to what he tells me....laughing...my day dreaming came to be.

Anonymous said...

GoldieZP - Only if your son, through his father, is a direct descendant of Melech Dovid would he be able to be 'Melech HaMoshiach'.

Neshama said...

If the media observed the laws of lashon harah, we would have hardly any newspapers, no TV news to speak of, and our conversations with others would be shorter and more positive. What would happen to those 10 measures of speech given to women? There’s a lot to think about in this inyan.

Anonymous said...

The only newspapers that will be around when Moshiach comes are ones that report good news. what are the 10 measures of speech given to women?